It's sometimes hard to know how to talk about mental health and how to support others in their mental health concerns. Guest, Curtis Snelgrove, helps us understand the signs and symptoms of mental illness, possible risk factors, and how we can protects ourselves and lend support to others.
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Jen: Hello and welcome to the Parents Place, a podcast put out by the Family Place for parents to develop skills that will strengthen families and provide tools that will help each of us in our parenting efforts. No matter our skills we can always use reminders that help us work towards a safer, happier home. I'm your host. Jennifer Daly, the Education Director at the Family Place and my co-host is Sara Hendricks, a family educator at the Family Place. Every week, we will interview professionals that will provide valuable information that will make a difference when you apply it directly to your life. Thank you for joining us. Now, let's get started with today's episode. Hi and welcome to the Parents Place podcast. I'm your host, Jen Daly, and my co-host is Sara Hendricks.
Sara: Hello!
Jen: Today we have an amazing guest and we are going to discuss mental health and how we can help those in our lives. Curtis, can you tell us a little bit about yourself?
Curtis: Yeah! First of all, thanks for having me really appreciate this opportunity! So I am the mental health first aid project director at The Family Place. And coming up on two years there in that role. Prior to that, I loved being involved in the community. And so being able to have this opportunity in this role, how we can strengthen and help empower our community members, just know how they can help individuals that may be struggling and being aware of those individuals are just been really grateful to be able to build my community. So I just love being part of the Family Place, love getting out in the community and helping others as much as they can.
Sara: Well, welcome Curtis! I'm very excited for you to share your expertise with us today. We're talking about a topic that most people can relate to, and that is mental illness. It can also be called mental health. Those two words tend to be interchangeable. And when we're talking about mental health, a lot of times suicide gets brought up in this conversation. I think if we were sitting in a stadium filled with millions of people and we asked everyone to stand and then we ask them to take a seat if they know anyone that has died by suicide from there. From there remaining people who are still standing, we ask them if they personally have dealt with their own mental illness. And then finally, ask if they know anyone that has suffered from mental illness. There would be little, to nobody still standing. Mental illness is something that all of us can relate to in some way. So today we're going to talk more about this and learn how we can support ourselves and others in their own mental health struggles. So, Curtis, let's start by explaining mental health. What is that exactly?
Curtis: So we teach a class as mental health first aid and we talk about “What is mental illness”, especially when we're talking and discussing how to recognize it and what to do. How we define that is basically it's an illness or it's a state of being that disrupts an individual's ability to experience what I call the “L’s of life”. And there's five of them. So, it's a person's ability to live, laugh, love, learn and labor. It's a little interesting sometimes when I talk with individuals and they're familiar with maybe some signs and symptoms that they are like, Well, I, you know, I feel like I'm irritable. So, does that mean that I'm depressed, or does that mean that I have an anxiety disorder? And my answer to them is really pay attention to those L’s of life. Because if it really is impacting somebody to the extent that they're not able to have a meaningful relationship and love somebody or to show up to their job so they can provide for their family or be able to do what they need to in school to do well and understand what's going on, then that's maybe a good time to start having a conversation about what's going on in their life and maybe some changes they've gone through. So that's kind of how I would define as mental health is, is those state of being in a way that we are taking care of ourselves through stress reduction, modulation, those types of techniques, or if it's on the other side of that, as well as just mental health as in depression, anxiety, life changes and those types of things.
Jen: This affects a lot of people throughout our country and throughout our world. And I think especially now with the year that we've had, mental health is probably a bigger topic than what it may have been in the past. Can you give us some national statistics that can help us understand the impact that this has on our society?
Curtis: Absolutely. And you're right, it is very common. There is somebody that everybody knows that deals with some aspect of mental health, of mental illness and whether that's a crisis scenario or something like the suicidal thoughts or not. But the national statistics that we one of the main ones we talk about, especially when we teach mental health first aid, is that it's estimated that there's one in five individuals are suffering with a diagnosable mental illness. And the reason why I use it, particularly mental illness, is because that is something that can be diagnosed as an anxiety disorder or depression or reaction to a traumatic event. A lot of those different types of things. So if you think about that statistic, one in five people, that's pretty common. So ya, I would dare say that there is not going to be very many that know somebody or experience themselves some type of mental illness. And so one statistic I want to share with you is the delay that has been reported of individuals that have been diagnosed with a mental illness and the delay that was taken before they took the steps to receive that diagnosis and get the help they need. So the median is about 10 years to get help. The 10 years is a national statistic worldwide, though it's estimated for any type of anxiety disorder that a delay can range from three to 30 years. And so the question I want to pose and sharing that statistic of that delay is a rhetorical question for anybody who's listening to this is think to yourself, “What can I do that may help impact that statistic for the better?”
Jen
And I think that is so important, especially right now. Like I said, the year that we've had with the coronavirus and having to be socially distancing and staying at home more often can really trigger some of those feelings of isolation, of sadness, of loneliness, all of that, those kinds of things. And I just think that mental health is so important and to learn and to recognize the signs that can come along with it. I just feel like we may be seeing an increase and needing to help people due to this coronavirus. We're hardwired for connection and we need that. And that's kind of been disrupted right now.
Sara
So I find these statistics that you're sharing really interesting. I actually can relate to what you're saying about from the moment somebody maybe has a mental illness till the time they start getting help, that 10 year delay. I feel like I personally fit in there. And part of it was probably just me not knowing or understanding how I could get some help or feeling like I just need to get over it. It's fine. I just need to be happy, or I just need to stop playing up these ideas in my mind and making things up that don't actually exist and without the language to really understand mental health and mental illness. I didn't know that I needed help. Not that my mental health concerns are anything extreme, but I do experience anxiety and I didn't know how to talk about that. I think there's a big stigma centered around mental illness. We hear the words mental illness, and we think we just need to get over it. We just need to be happy. We just need to get out of the house.
Jen: Suck it up, buttercup!
Sara: Exactly! That's how a lot of people approach mental illness. But that is not the case if we think about mental illness as brain health and look at it that way. Our brains need to be healthy. And just like other organs in our body, if we have kidney failure or heart disease or whatever can happen with our other organs, we don't just say, get over it, suck it up. We go to a doctor and we get help. But for whatever reason, when it comes to mental health, we tend to feel like we just need to get over it or we just need to pray and have more faith because that's the problem. We don't have enough faith and sure we can pray. But then we go to the doctor and we get help. When it comes to our brain health, we need to be able to break through that stigma and change the way that we approach mental health so that we can be proactive in what's happening in our brains because our brains can get sick just like any other organ in our body. Curtis, you were also talking about how to recognize signs of mental illness, and that was part of it for me. Like, I just didn't recognize that those were science things that I was experiencing. Curtis, could you better help us understand some signs of mental illness and what some risk factors could be?
Curtis: Yeah, absolutely. And also, thank you so much, Sara, for sharing your story. You know, I find it very interesting in both my undergraduate and graduate school work, how frequently I see examples of trying to separate the body in the mind and treating them as they're separate things. And I'm very grateful for the classes and the focus that I had of many of my professors in in the area that I studied. That helped me understand that the body is not without the mind in the mind is not without the body. And you're absolutely right. I mean, I am guilty of that myself. This pandemic, there was a time not too long ago that I was in a pretty dark place, I was able to talk with my boss about some of the ways that I was feeling and got some very good help there. And I don't know why I put. It off as long as they did, and it wasn't in the nature of, you know, years, but it starts with understanding and learning. And if we can start to learn and understand, then that's just going to empower us that much more to be able to know and be better prepared, how to help ourselves and help other people as well. And so when we talk about signs and symptoms, a sign is something that is expressed in an outward way that others can see it. And then a symptom is something that an individual experiences or feels on the inside is not necessarily manifested on the outside. I use this as an example. It's so you think about sadness. If somebody is crying, that's a very common sign because you can see it that somebody's sad. But that sadness that they're feeling, that's the symptom. So just to kind of understand the difference between the two, but those signs and symptoms, I mean, they can really be classified in in how it impacts your body. There can be physical. There can be emotional. There can be psychological. And so just going back again to that principle, the body is not without the mind, the mind is not without the body. And so things like crying or feeling like there's no point or no purpose in life, self-blame, being pessimistic, having mood swings or being angry or irritable, sleeping too much or sleeping too little. You know, there's really an unending list of signs and symptoms, and they just want to emphasize this again. Like just because somebody, for example, may have a loss of interest in an activity does not mean that, OK, well, they have a diagnosable mental health illness, you know?
But if that individual or those that are around that individual see a change from what that person is, then that is impacting their ability to live, laugh, love, learn and labor, then that's when we want to start having that conversation and find out and be there to say, “Hey, I am, I'm noticing this. I care about you as an individual. Let's talk. What can I do for you? How can I be there for you?” So those are just some of the signs and symptoms to understand. There are some risk factors, too, though, that we need to kind of keep in mind. We're all our own individual, and so different things impact us different ways. But if you think about trauma and trauma can be a risk factor if there is childhood trauma or if it was a recent trauma, if you witnessed a car accident or if you survived a car accident like those are types of things that can be a risk factor. If an individual has another mental health illness like a diagnosable mental illness, then yeah, that's definitely a risk factor for another mental illness. You know, things like family history, ongoing stress, major life changes like those are all risk factors to be aware of.
Jen: I think that's super important to understand the difference between signs and risk factors. The next part that I feel is important for everyone to understand are what are some protective factors that we can put in place to help those who may have mental health issues?
Curtis: What an important question to know and understand! One of the biggest, I would say, is having one stable adult in their life. And other protective factors, I would just say find something that you love and do it! Connect with nature. Go on a hike. Get outside. Get some sunshine. Listen to some music. Now take that extra five minutes in a hot shower. Watch that extra show your bingeing on Netflix, like whatever it is to kind of help you recharge your batteries because it's so important to do that self-care. And it's a huge protective factor for you as an individual, in a support role or for your own personal life. So I would just say, like, find something, find various things, experiment. If you've heard of something, try it! If it's an appropriate activity, invite somebody to do it with you. And that can be a huge protective factor because you're building that connection and strengthening that connection while doing something that brings you joy and they will start being events in your life that will be a highlight and a strengthening point, especially if it's in a time of difficulty
Jen: Over this pandemic, I've really had to find something. because I was finding myself getting really down and things like that. And so it was trial by error, trying different things to do that were appropriate during this time. I started out with a paint by number. Poor Sara has that in her home, but it's high enough to where you can't really tell all of the mistakes. But I did find something else that I really do enjoy, and it's called 5D Painting and I've done lots of them, and then I'm able to take it a step further and give them away. And that gives me a sense of just happiness and able to hopefully put a smile on someone else's face when I when I give them away. So definitely trial by error. Just keep on trying and finding those things that you enjoy doing.
Sara: Jen, I love that paint by number that you gave me! It honestly brings me a lot of joy. I look at it every single day. It's a cactus. I love cactus, and it just fills me with joy. So thank you for finding something to get you through the pandemic because it has also blessed me. I was in the same boat where when shelter-in-place happened way back in, what was that March/April? I don't even remember anymore, but it affected me in a big way because one thing that really works for me is a protective factor is going to the gym and spending an hour at the gym by myself, listening to one of my favorite podcasts away from everybody. I'm an introvert and so being there by myself doing something just for me. Sure, I'm surrounded by people, but I'm not talking to any of them. And so that was really a big part of my self-care. And then also driving in my car, back and forth to work another time that I'm all alone, just with myself and my own thoughts. And both of those things disappeared from my life instantly with shelter in place. And so I had to find other things that would work for me because I saw very quickly how easy it is to slip down that slope when you don't have those protective factors to keep your brain healthy. So, Curtis, thank you for sharing all of those ideas with us for protective factors. I would like to see maybe if you can extend on that and tell us, what can parents do to support and promote mental health within their families?
Curtis: That is a very good question. There's two things that come to mind. First one is to love your family, accept them for who they are! I mean, we all need to progress and change and try to get to the place that we need to be. But we're our own individuals. And so, if we can just love each other, that's going to have a huge way of being able to foster situations where you can talk about and promote that wellness in your family. And that brings me to the second point, and that's be willing to talk about uncomfortable things. I mean, if we really want to make the difference in the life of somebody that we love, there will come a time where you're going to have to embrace some discomfort and do what needs to be done. If we're talking about a crisis situation. Suicide is a very real thing and it's a very uncomfortable topic. But if we want to be able to impact somebody's life and save their life, we need to say some things that are going to be very uncomfortable to say and in that situation with that type of a crisis. We need to ask directly, are you having thoughts of suicide and having that conversation? And when we're talking about mental illness, it's the same type of thing. I mean, I would dare say that if I were standing in that same football stadium that you were mentioning at the very beginning and we asked everybody, “OK, everybody raise your hand if you are willing and comfortable to talk about how you are feeling about your anxiety, about your depression, about your bipolar disorder or your postpartum or your childhood trauma”. I would dare say you're not going to see very many hands raise up and say, “Oh yeah, talk. To me about that!” But if we want to be able to promote that wellness, especially within the walls and the boundaries of our family and our home, we need to embrace that discomfort and we need to see. I don't want to talk about this, but I'm willing to embrace that discomfort to put my awkward feelings aside because I care about you and where you're at. I posed this question, you know, what are you willing to do to keep somebody alive, safe and healthy with you, even if it meant it was just for one more day? And I really feel that those are the two best answers is if you love them for who they are and if you're willing to deeply talk about those things that are uncomfortable.
Jen: Communication is really, really important, and I'm a strong believer in strong families can create strong communities. So, it does all stem back to the family and being open and loving and being able to communicate. So, as you have mentioned, you've taught some of these classes, and I'm sure you have some success stories. Do you have a success story that you can share with us?
Curtis: Yes! There have been some amazing stories. One of our coworkers, she saw a social media post and was like, “This kind of seems like it might be a red flag”. And I don't remember the exact details of what that was, but I do know that it was something to the point that she recognized that that was not right. And so, she reached out to them. And it was just it was just a simple, “Hey, how are you? I saw this and I’m concerned”. And she was able to go and help that individual, make sure that they were in a safe place, make sure their family was taken care of and that person got help.
Sara: I love that, Curtis! It's not up to us as citizens to diagnose people, but being more aware of what's going on in somebody else's behavior and being brave enough to approach them and say, “Hey, I've noticed something seems a little bit off. Want to talk about it?” can go a long way in helping close that 10 year gap that you're talking about. We are about out of time, but can you quickly share with us maybe some resources? There are places people can go for more information on this topic.
Curtis: Yeah. So I want to give you this number for sure. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a great resource, and for my understanding of it, when somebody calls it routes to somebody that's near the area that they're in, that number is 800-273-8255. The other resource that I would say is the Mental Health First Aid website, and that website is WWW.MentalHealthFirstAid.org. I would highly recommend you get on your local health department in the county that you live in and reach out to them or look through their website. You will be surprised what kind of resources and what kind of entities are out there as you start looking for and researching it out, even if it's just community members that you can connect with.
Sara:Well, Curtis, it's always a pleasure to hear you speak about mental health awareness. Your passion and drive is very apparent and we appreciate everything you've shared with us to help us better understand the importance of this topic. Our goal at the family place is to help eliminate the stigma surrounding mental health and provide information that allows everyone to recognize the signs and symptoms of mental health concerns and be a first responder in aiding someone to get the help they need. Please know if you do have a mental health concern and need to see a professional or take medication. It doesn't make you any kind of failure. It just means you're doing what it takes to be mentally healthy, and there's absolutely no shame in that! If you have any questions, need more information or want to take a mental health first aid course, Please feel free to check out our website at theFamilyPlace.org. As always, thank you for listening, and we hope you will be a starfish thrower in someone's life when it comes to mental health and lending support.
Thanks again for listening. The family places a non-profit organization in Logan, Utah, with a mission to strengthen families and protect children. We call ourselves starfish throwers. If you're unsure what that means, refer back to our introduction episode where we explain it. The good news is you can be a starfish thrower too! By subscribing to the Parents Place podcast and liking our social media pages. If this episode resonated with you, please share it with others and help us get our message out to more people. Also, be sure to check the show notes for links to information referenced in this episode. That's all for now! But we'll catch you again next time on the Parents Place!
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Subject Resources: - Mental Health First Aid: www.mentalhealthfistaid.org - Safe UT App for Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.p3tips.safeut&hl=en&gl=US - Safe UT App for iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/safeut/id1052510262 - National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 - Bear River Health Department Resource Mental Health Directory: https://brhd.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/MH-Directory-2020-FINAL.pdf
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